I’m so sick of the anti intellectualism its bordering self infantilization and it’s a concern it’s actually irritating seeing the same content being pumped out are we checking off boxes for a membership to a club or something there is absolutely no room for individualism, growth, or critical thinking I need people to put down their phones and pick up a book Muslim woman are starting to look like empty shells with no hobbies or passions outside marriage and vela. While there is nothing wrong with wanting to get married one day obsessing over it is not healthy go live your life explore your passions make a difference in your community is marriage is written in your qadr inshallah khair so much wasted potential of women sitting around waiting for the non existent Prince Charming to walk through the door girl stand up it’s so so discouraging seeing that Muslim woman have little to no representation in society how are we the only group of women that have little to no representation or take up any space in society? There are so many talented Muslim women please take up space and spread your knowledge and passions you are an intellectual autonomous human act like one please, I’m extremely concerned about how many Muslim woman romanticize the idea of being controlled and told what to do I’m constantly hearing “I just want to turn my brain off my husband can make all the decisions” why? You are an adult not a child the self infantilization is the down fall of the Muslim community I’m sorry but please wake up 👏🏼
Who da hell says they want to turn their brains off around a man. Your mind and acquiring knowledge is your biggest asset in life. I feel as though its not safe to place your individuality and responsibility on someone else.
I've heard many muslim woman who have stated that they want to "turn their brain off" and their husband can make all the decisions and they just wanna exist, look pretty, go to pilates, shop, etc. I've lost count on how many times I have heard that statement before unfortunately. And I definitely agree that your mind and acquiring knowledge is your biggest asset in life and that you shouldn't hand someone your autonomy on a plate. In a way these women infantilize themselves and that's what irks me
i find this curious& think a lot of it is probably linked to the fact that, in many muslim households, girls are expected to act as caregivers / “a second mother” with cooking, cleaning, disciplining younger children, & modeling perfect behavior. as a result, there’s a strange contrast in which they’re expected to have little freedom & independence within their household, but also are expected to control their brothers, fathers, etc. and ensure that they are a “model” family. as a result, by the time they are married, they see decision making & household building as exhausting, making it easier for them to want to rely on their husbands or “turn their brain off” because they were forced to do so much as children / adolescent girls.
Honored to be included here and absolutely resonate with everything you’re saying!! The snark pages, overconsumption of vela, materialism, etc. Yet with all of this, seeing people like you who are able to unpack and call out these things brings me hope!!
Thank you for talking about this! I never really was aware, but now I realize why instead of being inspired by female muslim influencers, i rather felt jealous and anxious.
as a revert, what i see online shapes my idea of the "right muslim" more, i would say. and it hurt myself and my image of being a muslim a lot; are we really only focusing on marrying one day? all these cooking videos "preparing myself for marriage" seem so sad. are we nothing more than wives? no!! i want to cook for my family right now and the friends i love.
and dont get me started on "eid outfits". I LOVE THEM!! but it shifted my focus on eid on how i look like rather than what we truly should be celebrating.
i loved this post; it made me realize im not crazy and im not doing anything wrong by not having the best products and best hijabs and so on.
(one of the muslim influencers i love the most is farah; she genuinely makes such good content and shares her knowledge and thoughts perfectly)
in my younger years (i’m 24- oh so old, right?) I would write think pieces or just dive into topics that I felt needed more attention within the muslim and/ or black and african community. seeing this piece that dissects the muslimah experience online has really made me so happy. I pray Allah s.w.t continues to make your tongue light and expand your chest, for you to continue to express your thoughts and that people understand you! that was a v long blah coded message to say- I’m so happy that you voiced this and I wish you nothing but mental clarity and peace 🫶🏽
THIS! Is one of the best things I've read so far. Your critique is so on point, I want every muslim girl to read this.
One of my Ramadan goals is to distance myself from emotions that aren't mine and stop living the life of others, that's why I stopped following almost every influencer I followed (majority hijabis).
I also found that we're ''westernizing'' ourselves, fitting into aesthetics, and trends - making our looks more digestable to the white gaze. But on the other hand, the more khimars you wear or the more khaleeji you look, the more ''pious'' you are. This has to stop, like literally.
Where are the thinkers of our generation? Where are the leaders? If voices of reason aren't the ones flooding our fyps, then I fear the battle against imperialism and oppression is lost.
Great thought piece. I too have avoided most influencers but one day I was at the masjid and an influencer (I didn’t know she was one) just started talking to me and our kids were playing so happily. I believe a lot of people have more depth and character than they reveal online because they need to make sales for their business.. it was really eye opening to be in their home, and see that truly they believe in the beige and the vela scarves and that whole aesthetic but there’s more complexity than the outward appearance. Maybe im just more sympathetic that we all have phases of life when this brain rot can happen and just give some grace and space to those influencers too
i definitely think sympathy + grace is so important!! i’ve definitely fallen into the craze of this as i’ve come into myself a little more as looked a lot to other successful muslim women to figure out who i could be and what possibilities existed. like you said, behind our screens, we are all living similar lives in faith, even if our material or other realities are different. 🩷
Also those influencers throw like THE best parties. 😂😂 there’s always a vetted product recommendation from them which actually for someone who can have $0 spend outside of food, that’s kinda helpful to my life, especially in Ramadan when I have to buy stuff for friends and family
I’m only now finding this post (probably cause Im not the intended audience as a Man without Instagram), but I’m very interested in exploring the various online communities that exist in the current sphere of the Islamic Internet and intend to write a piece on my experiences with these bubbles.
Not for a pointed form of criticism, but is it possible to share a couple examples of either posts or creators who embody this sub culture?
The end goal of my analysis is to help provide Muslims with advice on simply existing online, as we spend more and more of our time on screens, and just like we need to know how we ought to be in any other space, we need to know the pitfalls of Muslim Online spaces and how to better them.
i think it honestly boils down to superficiality, stemming from a lack of taqwa. I myself as a muslimah, understand what it’s like to become infatuated with a consumerist culture branded to feel like it’s “including” my identity as a hijabi, but in reality, it distances us from what being a muslimah truly is. It’s about upholding modesty in speech and actions through kindness. This is one of the many plights we experience as Muslims in the West, because it’s difficult to amalgamate “fitting in” to what western societies deem to be “cool” & what the Quran and sunnah teach us about how to act correctly as Muslim women.
I started content creation recently, and what you just said is sooo true!!! Since I started I always knew that showing a perfect and polished part of me is not what I want to be known for. I’m currently struggling with this, but my long term goal is to empower women through faith infused self growth and self-dev talks inshaAllah. 🥹
Came across this on my feed - honestly didn’t realise it was such a big thing although scrolling on Reddit I do see a lot of the behaviour you describe.
I’ve also had the misfortune of being on the Muzz social app (already married, wanted to support a Muslim social network) and Muslim brain rot in general is on full display.
Wonderfully written and well put. I think we’re afraid of our realness and that’s why so many of us hold back on showing up as we are. We get caught up in things with little meaning, such as how much love and acceptance we’ll receive by putting our honest selves out there. I do believe a lot of us have depth but it gets lost in the process of influencing others in the ways we think we need to. Loved this piece.
Love every line of this. I have avoided the Muslim influencers with a vengeance because it's not my scene, and yet I come across them in spite of myself. Thanks for putting it so well.
I’m so sick of the anti intellectualism its bordering self infantilization and it’s a concern it’s actually irritating seeing the same content being pumped out are we checking off boxes for a membership to a club or something there is absolutely no room for individualism, growth, or critical thinking I need people to put down their phones and pick up a book Muslim woman are starting to look like empty shells with no hobbies or passions outside marriage and vela. While there is nothing wrong with wanting to get married one day obsessing over it is not healthy go live your life explore your passions make a difference in your community is marriage is written in your qadr inshallah khair so much wasted potential of women sitting around waiting for the non existent Prince Charming to walk through the door girl stand up it’s so so discouraging seeing that Muslim woman have little to no representation in society how are we the only group of women that have little to no representation or take up any space in society? There are so many talented Muslim women please take up space and spread your knowledge and passions you are an intellectual autonomous human act like one please, I’m extremely concerned about how many Muslim woman romanticize the idea of being controlled and told what to do I’m constantly hearing “I just want to turn my brain off my husband can make all the decisions” why? You are an adult not a child the self infantilization is the down fall of the Muslim community I’m sorry but please wake up 👏🏼
Who da hell says they want to turn their brains off around a man. Your mind and acquiring knowledge is your biggest asset in life. I feel as though its not safe to place your individuality and responsibility on someone else.
I've heard many muslim woman who have stated that they want to "turn their brain off" and their husband can make all the decisions and they just wanna exist, look pretty, go to pilates, shop, etc. I've lost count on how many times I have heard that statement before unfortunately. And I definitely agree that your mind and acquiring knowledge is your biggest asset in life and that you shouldn't hand someone your autonomy on a plate. In a way these women infantilize themselves and that's what irks me
i find this curious& think a lot of it is probably linked to the fact that, in many muslim households, girls are expected to act as caregivers / “a second mother” with cooking, cleaning, disciplining younger children, & modeling perfect behavior. as a result, there’s a strange contrast in which they’re expected to have little freedom & independence within their household, but also are expected to control their brothers, fathers, etc. and ensure that they are a “model” family. as a result, by the time they are married, they see decision making & household building as exhausting, making it easier for them to want to rely on their husbands or “turn their brain off” because they were forced to do so much as children / adolescent girls.
Honored to be included here and absolutely resonate with everything you’re saying!! The snark pages, overconsumption of vela, materialism, etc. Yet with all of this, seeing people like you who are able to unpack and call out these things brings me hope!!
Thank you for talking about this! I never really was aware, but now I realize why instead of being inspired by female muslim influencers, i rather felt jealous and anxious.
as a revert, what i see online shapes my idea of the "right muslim" more, i would say. and it hurt myself and my image of being a muslim a lot; are we really only focusing on marrying one day? all these cooking videos "preparing myself for marriage" seem so sad. are we nothing more than wives? no!! i want to cook for my family right now and the friends i love.
and dont get me started on "eid outfits". I LOVE THEM!! but it shifted my focus on eid on how i look like rather than what we truly should be celebrating.
i loved this post; it made me realize im not crazy and im not doing anything wrong by not having the best products and best hijabs and so on.
(one of the muslim influencers i love the most is farah; she genuinely makes such good content and shares her knowledge and thoughts perfectly)
oh my gosh i love farah! her podcast is great and her personal stories are so inspiring! so happy someone mentioned her here
in my younger years (i’m 24- oh so old, right?) I would write think pieces or just dive into topics that I felt needed more attention within the muslim and/ or black and african community. seeing this piece that dissects the muslimah experience online has really made me so happy. I pray Allah s.w.t continues to make your tongue light and expand your chest, for you to continue to express your thoughts and that people understand you! that was a v long blah coded message to say- I’m so happy that you voiced this and I wish you nothing but mental clarity and peace 🫶🏽
this is so sweet, thank you so much!! i appreciate you 🩷 may Allah سبحانه وتعالى continue to bless you.
THIS! Is one of the best things I've read so far. Your critique is so on point, I want every muslim girl to read this.
One of my Ramadan goals is to distance myself from emotions that aren't mine and stop living the life of others, that's why I stopped following almost every influencer I followed (majority hijabis).
I also found that we're ''westernizing'' ourselves, fitting into aesthetics, and trends - making our looks more digestable to the white gaze. But on the other hand, the more khimars you wear or the more khaleeji you look, the more ''pious'' you are. This has to stop, like literally.
Where are the thinkers of our generation? Where are the leaders? If voices of reason aren't the ones flooding our fyps, then I fear the battle against imperialism and oppression is lost.
I’d like to shoutout my favourite Muslim influencer: Eslimah! She’s what we need more of.
Great thought piece. I too have avoided most influencers but one day I was at the masjid and an influencer (I didn’t know she was one) just started talking to me and our kids were playing so happily. I believe a lot of people have more depth and character than they reveal online because they need to make sales for their business.. it was really eye opening to be in their home, and see that truly they believe in the beige and the vela scarves and that whole aesthetic but there’s more complexity than the outward appearance. Maybe im just more sympathetic that we all have phases of life when this brain rot can happen and just give some grace and space to those influencers too
i definitely think sympathy + grace is so important!! i’ve definitely fallen into the craze of this as i’ve come into myself a little more as looked a lot to other successful muslim women to figure out who i could be and what possibilities existed. like you said, behind our screens, we are all living similar lives in faith, even if our material or other realities are different. 🩷
Also those influencers throw like THE best parties. 😂😂 there’s always a vetted product recommendation from them which actually for someone who can have $0 spend outside of food, that’s kinda helpful to my life, especially in Ramadan when I have to buy stuff for friends and family
Asalamu Alaikum,
I’m only now finding this post (probably cause Im not the intended audience as a Man without Instagram), but I’m very interested in exploring the various online communities that exist in the current sphere of the Islamic Internet and intend to write a piece on my experiences with these bubbles.
Not for a pointed form of criticism, but is it possible to share a couple examples of either posts or creators who embody this sub culture?
The end goal of my analysis is to help provide Muslims with advice on simply existing online, as we spend more and more of our time on screens, and just like we need to know how we ought to be in any other space, we need to know the pitfalls of Muslim Online spaces and how to better them.
beautiful piece!
i think it honestly boils down to superficiality, stemming from a lack of taqwa. I myself as a muslimah, understand what it’s like to become infatuated with a consumerist culture branded to feel like it’s “including” my identity as a hijabi, but in reality, it distances us from what being a muslimah truly is. It’s about upholding modesty in speech and actions through kindness. This is one of the many plights we experience as Muslims in the West, because it’s difficult to amalgamate “fitting in” to what western societies deem to be “cool” & what the Quran and sunnah teach us about how to act correctly as Muslim women.
Great piece. Shout out to @tazzyphe, @bajifey Tasneem Afridi for her meaningful content.
I started content creation recently, and what you just said is sooo true!!! Since I started I always knew that showing a perfect and polished part of me is not what I want to be known for. I’m currently struggling with this, but my long term goal is to empower women through faith infused self growth and self-dev talks inshaAllah. 🥹
Came across this on my feed - honestly didn’t realise it was such a big thing although scrolling on Reddit I do see a lot of the behaviour you describe.
I’ve also had the misfortune of being on the Muzz social app (already married, wanted to support a Muslim social network) and Muslim brain rot in general is on full display.
Substack is light years ahead.
Wonderfully written and well put. I think we’re afraid of our realness and that’s why so many of us hold back on showing up as we are. We get caught up in things with little meaning, such as how much love and acceptance we’ll receive by putting our honest selves out there. I do believe a lot of us have depth but it gets lost in the process of influencing others in the ways we think we need to. Loved this piece.
thanks for this. it’s a thing in the Christian world as well. i’ve been thinking to write about it but have been nervous.
Love every line of this. I have avoided the Muslim influencers with a vengeance because it's not my scene, and yet I come across them in spite of myself. Thanks for putting it so well.
Well well well said!!
Thank you for sharing 🤍